Pink Sun Glasses & a White Bonnet

Last night I spent the evening with a good friend. We played Little Big Planet -I tell you, it's fantastic! The problem solving aspect really focuses me and always puts me in a good mood. Leave it to the British!-, had some fantastic lasagna and watched the Sex and the City movie. I was a little worried about watching the movie because I had seen it before and knew what the plot was about. I was afraid it would upset me and make my hopeless loneliness even worse. As it turns out, it was surprisingly clarifying. I feel much better today than I had for the past couple of days.

I decided to start writing down the thoughts and feelings that I have in a journal of sorts. I write as if I were speaking to a particular someone. I don't know if I'll ever give it to them but just writing it down makes me feel better. I have always been afraid that I will lose a thought and never find it again so I have always written things for preservation's sake. It's also quite cathartic to explore a thought fully enough to put it to paper; the same way it is to actually say something out loud instead of just letting it mull around in your brain.

I still have no idea what's going to happen in my life but I am starting to feel a bit more in control of it all. For so long I have felt adrift at sea, at the mercy of my surroundings, but now I feel like I've got an ore. It's not much, but it's a start.